Yesterday I was rejected. I'm not too upset about it - over the past 15 years I've had many, many rejections. Some have been standard 'thanks, but no thanks', as was the one yesterday; others have been much nicer, some have been helpful and reassuring and positive.
No, what I do get upset about is researching the next publisher. Because so much can be found online - including exerpts of the books said publisher is currently producing - there is much more opportunity to compare my writing to others, and compare I do, usually unfavourably.
Part of the problem is that I am never writing what is popular. A few years ago you couldn't look at the blurb of - it seemed - any book without it being described as humorous, the most depressing, complex novels were all saved by humour. Today, this very hour, everything has been original. Now I know I am original, but when I'm forced to defend my originality against other works, I suddenly feel very ordinary.
I sent off the next submission package, but I am not feeling my optimistic best...