Wednesday, 7 November 2012

Insecure? Yes, yes I am...

Welcome to this month's Insecure Writer's Support Group. If you want to know more, click on the logo in the side-bar and you'll discover a world of people just as insecure as you!!

I think this month I'm going to just sit quietly in the corner and nibble on the Custard Creams. Not because I'm not feeling insecure, but because I'm not sure there are any new ways to express this month's insecurities - I'm taking part in NaNoWriMo, which explains everything (especially if you read my last post here)

So I'm eating Custard Creams which I'm dunking into my tea and making a sludgy mess in the bottom of my mug, and trying not to think about writing.

Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I hadn't wanted to be a writer:

  • I'd have a super-clean house
  • I'd read more
  • I'd be able to sit down with a cup of tea and relax with a magazine, rather than feeling the need to check email, send email, keep my Facebook page updated
  • I'd have time to get hooked on soaps
  • I'd be able to watch any TV programme without my laptop on my lap
  • I'd be able to see my friends more often... and my parents!
  • I'd probably have a full-time job, and money
  • But I'm sure I'd feel like something was missing...

What would you do if you didn't write?


76 comments:

  1. I really don't know what I would do if I didn't write but I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have a cleaner house.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol, yes, I think that was wishful thinking on my part :-)

      Delete
  2. I've been writing 'seriously' for about four years now and honestly I don't know what I would do without it. It drives me mad and keeps me sane at the same time! My writing time is my little oasis in the chaos of life :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "Drives me mad and keeps me sane" - that's so true!

      Delete
  3. I have no clue what I'd do if I didn't write! I don't really know what I did with my time before I started taking writing seriously lol.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I never had a time 'before writing' - I've always written. Non-writers fascinate me :-)

      Delete
  4. I would be totally bored if I did not write - although I often think I would rather be doing something else other that write!But thats just procrastination. A disease I am rather prone to!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Some of the best writers seem to have to bribe themselves to sit down and actually write - it's a strange phenomenon!

      Delete
  5. I wouldn't wake up in the middle of the night and speak to a recorder on my phone. Then, in the morning, when I press play it's "What the heck was that about?"
    But, if I wouldn't be a writer, something would be missing in my life and I wouldn't know what it was :(

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I do the same thing with scribbled notes in the middle of the night. By morning they've mutated into doodles on the page.

      Delete
  6. Ha! My house would no doubt be so much cleaner too!

    Honestly, I'd probably be in group therapy. LOL Because if I couldn't write out about all the stuff that bothers me, I would be keeping it bottled up inside until I exploded.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I use writing to splurge my feelings. Some of my short stories are very obviously (to me) autobiographical. Doesn't it make you feel better when you can kill and maim characters?

      Delete
  7. Ha ha ha, I didn't think anyone decided to be a writer or had the choice. For me it is just something that I have to do :) If I din't spend so much time writing I would probably join a class and most likely FOR SURE have a cleaner house :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh I definitely didn't choose. I was about 14 when I started writing, and 15 when I started submitting. Because of that, I often wonder how my life would have turned out without writing.

      Delete
  8. I pondered the same question and couldn't come up with an answer. Writing feeds my soul.
    Karen

    ReplyDelete
  9. I would like to think I'd be more "normal" but I doubt it. I think the weirdness would just find another outlet. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Writing is probably the most serene way to spurt weirdness. I'm not sure I'd want to be 'normal' either!

      Delete
  10. Yeah, we'd have a super clean house too. Right now we have someone come over one or twice a month to give it a super duper cleaning because we're too busy and all my down time is spent writing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'd love someone to super-duper clean my house. I'm envious!

      Delete
  11. Now I understand why successful writers have people come in and cook, clean, do laundry, etc. I don't get any of that stuff done! The royalties from my first book will definitely have to go into a trust fund for housekeeping needs.

    Nice post...I could relate so well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm actually lucky enough to have a Hubby who does more than his fair share. But I will never leave him alone with the laundry! Thanks for the follow :-)

      Delete
  12. Are you gonna share any of that custard cream?! Yeah, a lot gets pushed by the wayside, but you know, a lot got put on the back burner when I worked a "full-time" job too. I'll choose this any day!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But even with a full-time job, people get to go home and relax! I can quite easily write from the moment I wake up to the moment I fall into bed. Of course I'll share - you're more than welcome :-)

      Delete
  13. If I didn't write I would be away with the fairies by now - it's what keeps me sane while at the same time sending me mad. If that makes sense?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Suzanne, further up, said the same thing about sanity and madness - aren't we lucky, though, to have writing in our lives?

      Delete
  14. I often wonder exactly the same thing - and have visions of myself actually cleaning things and visiting people (sorry, Dad!)
    If I didn't write, I would do something else creative - I already make celebration cakes but perhaps I'd do a cake decorating course and tart up my skills, or I'd learn to use my sewing machine and make gorgeous bespoke cushion covers...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think the urge to create something would always be there for me too. But I like the idea of cushion covers!

      Delete
  15. If I didn't write, I'd go crazy. I've gone through periods in my life where I decided I needed to take other things more seriously, and they were horrible. Everyday was this battle with myself, where I felt like a whisp floating on the breeze of my own life.

    Then, when my daughter was 8 months old, and I was begging for time to do things like a work out, or grade homework assignments, I had the misfortune of receiving an entire novel plot into my brain in one second. I haven't had a clean house since.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A baby and a novel - you're not one for an easy life, are you? :-)

      Delete
  16. Annalisa, that is such a good question, and one to which I have often given thought. I think, if I had any, any, any choice in the matter, I'd want to work with a switchboard of some kind -- maybe sound in a theatre house or transferring video to DVD, something quiet and absorbing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 'Choice' - it seems such an easy word, doesn't it? Lol

      Delete
  17. Oh. My. Gosh. You read my mind. I ask myself this all the time!!! Why do I love the self-torture? If I quit writing...I really would have a clean house because I am a naturally busy person. I don't sit idle much. I may look idle as I stare off into space, but that's the best way to plot!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think I overstated my house-cleaning ambitions, I'd probably just go out for coffee more often!

      Delete
  18. By the way...you're not allowed to stop. I don't care if your house is clean or not. You have to write.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aw thanks Elizabeth - hopefully soon they'll be something new for you to read!

      Delete
  19. Oh, that is a good question. I'd probably read more and watch more TV and play more video games. Those seem like a lot of time wasting things, so I'm glad I am a writer and can do something that gives me a sense of accomplishment!

    Allison (Geek Banter)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree, that sense of accomplishment can't be recreated with very many other things in life.

      Delete
  20. i like this one!
    i would be able to clean my house! nah, i'd do something else like teach full time or start my own business...i like being my own boss!

    good luck w/nano! and your sludgy mess =)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You've got some great alternatives! But I expect you'll never get round to them - writing rules!

      Delete
  21. I'd like to think that I'd have a super clean house if I didn't write. I had one for about 2 weeks, then I realized that my kids were feeling a bit neglected as was my writing and figured of the three, the house was the least important. Besides, housework makes me miserable, haha. I'd probably read more and play more video games.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Writing and kids definitely come before a clean house - perfect priorities!

      Delete
  22. I used to be hooked on soaps like All My Children and Days of Our Lives, until I finally realized how ridiculous some of the storylines were. If I wasn't writing fiction, I'd have more time to write my dissertation. Except then I'd be bored and stressed out all the time, because fiction writing is more fun.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. When I first left home I watched every UK soap - I gradually weaned myself off them when I realised the storylines were all the same. If there was a cancer scare in one soap, it would appear in another a few months later. If there was a violent boyfriend, ditto. Neighbours (Australian soap) was particularly bad for recycling their own plots every couple of years.

      Delete
  23. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't write. It's just something I've always done since being a kid. Even if I'm not writing on paper (or screen), I'm making up stories in my head.

    ReplyDelete
  24. I don't know what I would do if I didn't write. It's the best thing that ever happened to me. I love the written word - seeing it on paper and typing the words are just so thrilling to me. The writing journey may be a grueling process, but it's also so fun meeting writers that so relate to you in this community. This group of people are so amazing and glad I've met them.

    Good luck with NaNo! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, we have the best group of bloggers ever!!

      Delete
  25. I'd be playing a lot more computer games and wasting time in front of the TV. I don't play many games now and I've switched that TV time to while I'm at work.
    But I think of all the amazing things that wouldn't have happened and I'm glad I chose to write!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wow, yes, your life must have changed so much. If you didn't write/blog you'd have weeks of just sitting down doing nothing. I'm glad you do both!

      Delete
  26. Before I started seriously writing, I zoned out in front of the TV for embarrassingly lengthy amounts of time. Then I went cold turkey from TV. So I suppose I'd still be a tv-oholic, and TV is pure rubbish now.

    Good luck with NaNoWriMo!
    xoRobyn

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The dumbing down of TV is one of my soapbox topics - I could talk for hours... but I won't :-)

      Delete
  27. A completed Nano project will fulfill you more than a clean house any day. Just keep yourself stocked up with custard cream. Good luck! Great IWSG post today!

    ReplyDelete
  28. If I didn't write, I'd have some other addictive and time-consuming hobby (career, really). I'm just not the type who can sit around and watch TV forever, nor does a clean house give me satisfaction like an artistic endeavor. We'll all just keep plugging away! :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am actually quite good at watching TV... I battle full-on TV addiction :-)

      Delete
  29. I wonder why I didn't start writing sooner...
    I've always been a reader, but doubted whether I could really write something that others would want to read. Now I realize that, hey, I do have a bit of writing talent/skill which can only get better and better, so maybe I do have something to offer, after all...
    I suppose that I'd be doing more reading if I hadn't gotten the writing bug... as it is, since I've started writing, I don't read as much as I used to... *sighs*

    ReplyDelete
  30. I can totally relate to this post. I mean, I do have a full time job and all out of necessity, but other than that I pretty much write. I don't read as much as I used to or go on as many hikes and my friends often get turned down when they ask me to come over. But if I didn't write, I'd go crazy. Before I started writing again, I felt a lot more lost and wondered what to do with my life. It's not like I love my job (at all), so knowing that I can go home and write gives me a raison d'etre.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, that lost feeling happens to me too. There's nothing quite like writing!

      Delete
  31. If I didn't write I wouldn't find the need to keep playing bloo*y Spider Solitaire!!! or Googling to find out who invented The Int. Date Line :-) I wouldn't have a cleaner house though because I loathe housework. I too would visit friends more.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Isn't spider solitaire great? My vice is sudoku, but I interchange it with solitaire. On second thoughts, I wouldn't have a cleaner house either.

      Delete
  32. I would probably be that mean person hanging around the office or packing your groceries at the supermarket. Writing truly did wonders for me and I cannot imagine being without it. Though, having a cleaner house? Nah...I am just lazy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Although imagine the people-watching you could do at a supermarket!

      Delete
  33. I think I'd die if I didn't write. It's just so much a part of who I am! Or maybe I'll just lose a lot of brain cells watching shows all the time!
    Nutschell
    www.thewritingnut.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. When you feel that strongly about writing, you know you'll always do it :-)

      Delete
  34. I'm pretty sure I'd be terribly lost if I didn't right. I had chocolate with my tea. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think that's the general consensus - writing it too important, and most people don't have a 'choice' over whether they do it or not! I haven't had chocolate yet today... must remedy that :-)

      Delete
  35. Thanks for the follow on Twitter, I am so glad I have found your blog, I agreed with almost everything on your list - don't think I ever want to be hooked on soap operas again, unless you count Dallas, I loved that reinvention of a classic and over a limited time span it suited me perfectly.
    If I didn't write? Well WHEN I didn't write and didn't spend so much time setting the voices in my head free a little piece of me died inside.
    One of my favourite ever quotes is from the film Flashdance.
    "If you give up your dreams you die."
    Long may the untidy houses of this world remain and thank God for the invention of Facebook and Twitter so now I know for certain that I am not alone in this madness we call "dreams of being a writer"
    Good luck with NaNoWriMo BTW, It's my first one and I am thriving on it if a little sleep deprived!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I watched the original Dallas but I couldn't bring myself to watch the new show.

      It's my first NaNoWriMo too, and I'm kind of enjoying the freedom to write whatever comes into my head without censoring, but I'm dismayed with how much rubbish I can write in one day :-)

      I find when I go through periods of not writing, my dreams get very vivid and disturbing... Much easier to write and have a bit of control over my subconscious!

      Delete
  36. Hi Annalisa .. when I used to study - I used to do all the things I shouldn't do .. and not do the studying ...

    I'm making a concerted effort to catch up with life now before Christmas comes - so 2013 and I can go along very happily hand in hand ...

    I know that when the writing comes it flows and I'll get into that mode more often now I hope ..

    Good luck to you ... write, write, write and never give up - oh I'd suggest giving up on the custard creams .. though I do love them too!! Cheers and enjoy the rest of the weekend .. Hilary

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Never give up! That's such great advice.

      Delete
  37. Good question. I'd paint, which I used to do. I'd also likely be a psychiatrist.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Psychiatry fits in so well with writing. I keep meaning to read some psychology books because I think it would be so interesting when dealing with my broken characters.

      Delete
  38. I'd probably go crazy eventually if I didn't write. But I'd probably also have a much more active social life.

    ReplyDelete

Please comment - I love a good chat!